Blog Post 4: Long Distance Relationship

Long Distance Relationship for me its just a mere stepping stone to know whether you and your partner are really meant for each other. I've said this because I myself is into long distance relationship ever since I moved here in Manila. Its beed 6 months now yet our relationship is still going strong. But in How I Met Your Mother long distance relationships are said to be the downfall of a good romantic relationship.

The first article that I've read is all about 10 Reasons Why Long-Distance Relationships Just Don't Work by Tom Scheve. He said that long distance relationships are more difficult to maintain than normal romantic relationships. He also discussed about numerous reasons on why long distance relationship fails. First is the "Communication Breakdown", he said that if both parties are used to being one another's presence it might become increasingly disheartening to communicate in less personal way as time goes on. Second is the "Lack of Trust",long distance relationship may collapse under the weight of suspicion or in a misguided effort to protect your heart, you may decide to make some bade decisions of your own. Third is "Time vs Returns,As more time passes, the distant object of your affections can begin to seem like something abstract and less than real. An e-mail in your inbox isn't the same as having someone nearby who can help you in person, who can share your day with you, and who can create new memories with you. Fourth is the "Separation Issues", Of course, physical separation will almost always result in an initial sense of increased anxiety and unhappiness. Often, the hurt feelings fade away and the relationship recovers, even at a distance. On the other hand, these feelings can also contribute to a sharp deterioration of the relationship, which is now measured in miles instead of shared dreams. Lastly "Different Expectations", "Long-distance relationship" can mean different things to different people. It may mean "heart-wrenching tragedy" to one person, while for the other partner it means "year-long vacation". If a couple doesn't share the same expectations before the separation occurs, it can spell doom for a long-distance relationship. For one half of the couple, it may be viewed as a test of the relationship's strength, with an eye toward reuniting as soon as possible. The other, however, may view the separation as a fresh taste of life all on one's own.

Well in every relationship you have to really know your partner and trust him or her for the relationship to work even if its long distance relationship. As for Ted Mosby he didn't trust her girlfriend (Victoria) that she would hold on to their relationship and also he assumed before hand that Victoria would break up with him. Just like what the second reason why long distance relationship fails "Lack of Trust" explains it Ted made some bad decisions on his own. They also showed in How I Met Your Mother the third reason "Time vs Returns", at the first few weeks of Ted and Victoria's long distance relationship they were great but as time goes by they don't have anything to tell each other anymore. Thus that resulted to a breakup.

The next article that I've read about long distance relationships is FAQs About Long Distance Relationship by JF Milne Publications. It states that Multiple studies have measured relationship quality and compared couples in long distance relationships to those in geographically close relationships. Couples in Long distance relationships report identical levels of relationship satisfaction, intimacy, trust, and commitment. Their studies also show that long distance relationships do not break up at any greater rate than more traditionally, geographical close, couples. Multiple studies comparing long distance relationships to geographically close couples finds the same rate of breaking up over time. The rate of break up over 3 months is 21% to close relationship and 37% to long distance relationship, over 6 months 30% to close relationship and 27% to long distance relationship and for over 1 year the rate of break up is 25% to close relationship and 8% to long distance relationship. This clearly shows that as time goes on as you and your partner are used to long distance relationship the chance of breaking up is lesser compared to close relationship.

Lack of satisfaction and physical connection is one of the reason why long distance relationship don't last. In one of the episodes of How I Met Your Mother, Marshall and Lily stated that long distance relationships don't work because its "All talk and no Sex just Kill me now".